February 12, 2015

Say ALOHA To Cameron Crowe With This Trailer

When this trailer for Aloha hit the web this morning, my wife sent me an article titled, "Are You Ready To Have Cameron Crowe Back In Your Life?"  For this guy, the answer is a resounding, "Fuck yeah."

Crowe is one of those guys who I can't help but love despite any and all logic.  And while Almost Famous is easily his best work and Jerry Maguire is certainly his most commercial, it's his more maligned films like Vanilla Sky and Elizabethtown that I find myself revisiting most often.  Sure they're far from perfect, but I guess I'm just a sucker for Crowe's particular brand of earnestness and bleeding heart sentimentality.  Besides, the guy wrote Fast Times At Ridgemont High.

Okay sure, Aloha looks like it borrows liberally from the Elizabethtown playbook, specifically the good looking guy who gets chewed out by Alec Baldwin after blowing a huge business deal and then having to move to his former home to sort his life out.  But after that we get a love triangle of sorts between Bradley Cooper's old flame (Rachel McAdams) and an energetic young Air Force officer (Emma Stone) and I guess he's working for his old boss and HOLY SHIT IS THAT BILL MURRAY???  Jesus fuck!  I am all about Bill Murray in full on Lester Bangs-mode, spouting insight and wisdom as only Bill Murray can.  And hey, maybe this movie will finally put Bradley Cooper back in my good graces.  Then again, maybe not.  Every time I see him do that little surfer hand gesture I want to punch him in the dick.

Also, nothing against Jon Krasinski, but I really hope that his character goes the whole movie without speaking.

February 10, 2015

PODCAST: Screening Episode 49 - JUPITER ASCENDING Cannot Maintain SUPREMACY


I want to love Jupiter Ascending.  SO MUCH.  And make no mistake, there is plenty here to keep you entertained, including some beautiful outer space visuals, Channing Tatum's anti-gravity rollerblades, the adorable Elephant Man and every second of Eddie Redmayne's utterly batshit performance which consists solely of hoarse whispers punctuated at random by ear-splitting screams.  But in the end, the most impressive thing about the latest Wachowski film is that it somehow manages to feel both thinly drawn and completely overstuffed at the same time.  Throw in a surprisingly inert Mila Kunis and a stifled Channing Tatum, add a romance with absolutely no chemistry whatsoever, and you end up with a movie that simply collapses under the weight of its richly detailed yet completely empty spectacle.

And yet, part of me can't wait to watch it again.  I guess that's just the kind of guy I am.

Jamie and Bart join me on the podcast to break down this big bad space opera, plus Bart and I continue to forge ahead through the Bourne franchise with The Bourne Supremacy.  Bart didn't particularly care for it, while I discovered that I've apparently been confusing it for the third Bourne movie for years.  Who knew?

PS: At one point I suggest that the Wachowskis particular brand of storytelling would be far better served by a long form premium TV series, completely forgetting that their next project, Sense8, is exactly that.  It airs on Netflix this May.  Huzzah!

Next Week: We celebrate Bart's Birthday with Kingsman: The Secret Service and The Bourne Ultimatum.

February 06, 2015

This POLTERGEIST Trailer Wants You To Fear Your Flatscreen

I caught up with the original Poltergeist for the first time this past Halloween.  It played as part of an all day marathon in a huge old local theater and I totally flipped for it.  My only wish is that it had played as the last film instead of right before the midday break.  That movie fucking plays, with scares and humor and and awesome mix of practical and old school optical effects.  Seriously, you could put that movie in theaters every Halloween and I'm convinced it would simply never go out of style.

Instead, we're getting a remake with Sam Rockwell, Rosemarie DeWitt and Irish Lane Pryce.  I mean, I guess.  Rockwell's great, but I doubt this movie will give him the chance to do any of the things that make me love him so.  Then again, the director is Gil Kenan and he's responsible for the seriously underrated Monster House.  So maybe there's hope!

What annoys me the most about this trailer is that, while it does look to stick pretty close to the original, it also looks fairly indistinguishable from a dozen other haunted house/ghost movies from the last few years.  It seems like they're compensating for a lack of originality with TONS MORE GHOSTS!  While that fucking clown doll is appropriately creepy, there's certainly nothing here as uniquely peculiar as the original's Zelda Rubenstein character.  I'll see it for sure, but the chances that it can hold a candle to Joe Dante's version seem pretty slim.

PODCAST: Screening Episode 48 - NIGHTCRAWLER Is A Natural BOURNE Creeper

Here is the second of two podcasts that Bart and I were able to squeeze in just before the Patriots epic Super Bowl victory.  If you listen carefully, you can hear the first of our party guests arrive, greeted by the howling barks of my dog, Nemo.

First we kick off our latest franchise rewatch with The Bourne Identity, although it's really only a rewatch for me.  Somehow Bart has managed to go 12+ years without ever seeing a Bourne movie, which is almost impressive.  I was surprised at how well the first entry holds up over all this time.  Bart was even able to overcome his longstanding disdain for Matt Damon and his "resting stupid-face," which actually comes in handy when he's playing an amnesiac.  We also tackle the birth of the quick cut/shakycam fight sequence and I must admit that it's nice to see the earliest, best version of what's become an overplayed gimmick.

After that we delve into the shocking Nightcrawler, which serves as further evidence of just how badly the Academy screwed the pooch on this year's Oscar nominations.  Holy hell.  Jake Gyllenhaal is nothing short of astounding as Lou Bloom, a freelance news cameraman who brings a whole new meaning to the word sociopath.  It is a riveting performance in a breathtakingly ugly film and I mean that in a good way.  How Nightcrawler has managed to fly largely under the radar is utterly beyond me.  Not only does the film demand your attention, but it stays with you long after it's over. This thing is a conversation starter to be sure.  Between this and the upcoming Southpaw, it looks as if we're entering into a golden age of Gyllenhaal.  I can't wait until he wins an Oscar and later generations go back and discover his seminal performance in Bubble Boy.

Next Week: We continue on with The Bourne Supremacy and blast off with Jupiter Ascending.

February 04, 2015

I Dare You Not To Love This MAGIC MIKE XXL Teaser

No one was more surprised than me at how much I enjoyed Magic Mike.  My dude-crush on Channing Tatum is now undeniable, as is the majesty of this teaser for the unlikely-yet-impeccably-titled sequel, Magic Mike XXL.

Seriously, this thing is perfect in every way.  From Tatum's bench spasms turned gravity-defying dance moves, to Joe Manganiello opening beverages through sheer cock strength, to the sassy "You're Welcome" title card, to the fact that this will seemingly be a film which attempts to glamorize Myrtle fucking Beach.  But most of all I adore when Tatum tells Amber Heard his name, does a little spin move, doesn't quite stick the landing but MAINTAINS EYE CONTACT and then saunters off like a boss.  You just can't teach that stuff.

Am I a little worried that Soderbergh and McConaughey are both AWOL?  Sure.  But I'm excited at the addition of Heard, Elizabeth Banks, Donald Glover and even Jada Pinkett Smith.  If she does her weird Eartha Kitt voice from Gotham, I'll be over the moon.

Magic Mike XXL will make 50 Shades Of Gray look like a punk ass bitch on July 1st.

PODCAST: Daley Planet - These Ghostbusters Have No Dicks (Feb 1, 2015)

We had a little hiccup in the recording process this week, which means that while we recorded about an hour's worth of podcast for the latest Daley Planet, I'm only publishing the first 25 minutes or so.  The last half sounded like it was recorded in an echo chamber for reasons passing understanding.  Oh Garageband, you fickle beast!

But this little mini episode is still pretty good!  You can listen to Bart and I expound upon our totally not sexist trepidation over the recently announced Ghostbusters reboot cast and then hear us contemplate Chris Pratt's cinematic future.

Coming Soon: The Daley Screening tackles Nightcrawler and begins a full rewatch of the Jason Bourne franchise, beginning with The Bourne Identity.  No glitches in that one!

February 03, 2015

The FURIOUS 7 Super Bowl Spot Is Preposterously Awesome

It's been two days since the Super Bowl and I'm still having some trouble believing that the Football Gods actually allowed my Patriots to win that game.  Whether you believe in all that Deflategate nonsense or not, I think we can all agree that the ratio of game-based excitement to ad-based entertainment was incredibly lopsided this year.  I think the best ad I saw the whole game was for avocados.

But we also got a crop of mini-trailers for big upcoming features, including Terminator, Pitch Perfect 2, Tomorrowland and Jurassic World.  But the only one of these worth really talking about is the spot for Furious 7.

What unholy deal did Vin Diesel make with Beelzebub which allows each of these movies to be better than the last one?    How is this possible?  Was Paul Walker collateral damage?  Somebody get the Vatican on this, STAT.

I don't even know where to begin.  The importance of family has become the prevailing theme of these movies, so I love seeing that same theme play out on the villain's side as well.  The Toretto house explosion is pretty baller, and I would have expected this to be the kind of thing used to write Walker out of the series but it looks like it happens right up front and sets the rest of the movie in motion.  The Rock saying "Daddy's gotta go to work" makes me happier than decorum should permit.  But that car jumping from building to building though...holy fuck.  That absolutely silenced my Super Bowl party.

My only disappointment with this (and all) trailers is not enough Kurt Russell.  Here's hoping I don't walk out of the movie with the same complaint.

On a related note, Amazon currently has EVERY Fast & Furious movie available for $10 or less per Blu-ray.  You can also get the whole thing as a box set for $50.  Happy early birthday to me!