August 22, 2014

Sigourney Weaver Passes On THE EXPENDABELLES. Linda Hamilton Charges Her Cell Phone.


Despite its surprising lack of terribleness, Expendables 3 looks to be a serious disappointment at the box office.  And yet somehow plans continue for an all-female spinoff called (I shit you not) The Expendabelles.  The last few months it's only existed as a vague idea and a very silly title, but now there appears to be some form of a script and so offers are being made to ladies with a history of cinematic ass-kickery.

Unsurprisingly the first offer went out to Sigourney Weaver and thankfully she turned it down.  Frankly I'm not all that surprised, especially in light of the revelation that the script revolves around a team of mercenary women who are forced to infiltrate the island lair of maniacal villain by posing as high priced call girls.  Sigourney Weaver is way to classy for that bullshit.  Besides, she's gonna be involved in the next 27 Avatar films that James Cameron has planned, so it's hardly as if she needs the paycheck.

In the end I expect that, much like the testosterone-y version, we'll get a mix of real actresses and some MMA types.  Gina Carano seems like a lock and I wouldn't be surprised to see Rhonda Rousey make another appearance, despite being the weakest link of the third entry.  Michelle Rodriguez, Kate Beckinsale, Milla Jovovich, Katee Sackoff and Lucy Liu are all likely candidates, but they're definitely going to need a big, Stallone-esque name to anchor this thing and there simply aren't a lot of options.  Linda Hamilton is probably a good fit, as is Jamie Lee Curtis or Daryl Hannah.  I'm not sure if Pam Grier or Gena Davis are still combat ready, but I'd love to seem them show up in some capacity.  And hey, what's Brigitte Nielson up to these days?

Then again, if they can't inject some serious star power into this thing I wouldn't be surprised to see it simply fade away.  That's probably for the best, as it took Stallone three tries to figure out how to make these movies right.  I suspect a female version wouldn't get quite so many chances.